During this festive time of year, many of us are forced to make painfully boring chit-chat at all sorts of functions with all sorts of people.
Strangers, half-acquaintances, friends of friends and, worst of all, random distant family members. Those relatives we only see once in a blue moon bring with them a whole different punishment when it comes to making Christmas small talk.
The great news is I have some gold nuggets for you – tips to lubricate the conversation wheels and save you from constantly drawing a blank when it comes to banal banter.
Fact 1: crows can hold grudges against humans for as long as 17 years. Isn’t this the coolest? New research shows crows are super-smart and more than just black-feathered figures cawing from treetops.
They are masters of memory and grudges and will remember you if you are aggressive to them.
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Fact 2: female frogs fake their own deaths to avoid mating with males they do not like. Scientists have discovered female frogs have developed several ways to get out of sex, including rolling, grunting and faking their own deaths.
A brutal but brilliant way of rejecting someone, if you ask me!
Fact 3: some people in the world are afraid of bananas. This phobia is called bananaphobia, I kid you not.
Fact 4: a 110-year-old Perth woman has credited a glass of beer every day as being the reason for her longevity.
Bridget Grocke, who just turned 110, is officially Australia’s second-oldest person and enjoys one glass of Emu Export beer every day. A ‘bush chook’ a day keeps the doctor away.
As one of Australia’s oldest residents, Mrs Grocke has lived through two world wars, the Depression, a recession we had to have and the pandemic.
Despite all these challenges she has never skipped a daily ale.
The former David Jones worker has four children, 10 grandchildren and 10 great-grandchildren. No wonder she needs a beer at the end of the day.
And if these facts fail when it comes to making that painful chit-chat with Uncle Gavin, then ask him what his inner drag queen name is.
Your drag queen name is your grandmother’s first name and the last sweet you ate (mine, for the record, is Margaret Cookie).
Sami Muirhead is a radio announcer, blogger and commentator. For more from Sami, tune into Mix FM