Put the darned phone down.
It is an interloper, a menace, an invader, a time thief.
The addiction is real.
But if you dare say so, people nod sagely, shrugging. What can you do?
Our hand-held devices are used for far more than fun or socialising. They are a necessity in the everyday, and going without them is equivalent to shirking sleep or food.
But for health and balance in our lives, we must.
I am guilty of being tethered, even when I have the chance to disconnect.
What if someone needs to reach me urgently? What if something happens to one of my elderly parents?
We know emergencies are unlikely to happen in this particular window of time. We know that if they did, we would find out soon enough, just as we did in times past.
But even when My Beloved – the One who matters most to me – is nearby, my phone is kept within reach.
We all come up with excuses galore, reasoning our phones are now our camera, our eftpos access, our diary.
They are our hold-all, our everything.
But really, the core of it is our addiction.
Experts say the phone addiction works on the same part of the brain as alcohol or drugs, playing on our weakest points, tricking us into not being able to do without it.
It contributes to mental ill-health, poor sleep and (strangely) social disconnection.
The attention paid is out of control: a message from a beau during a bike ride needs an instant response; a friend posts a cute picture and a return emoji simply can’t wait.
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We recently had a friend staying who was incapable of being away from her phone even when she stated her need to work on being present in the moment with the real people around her.
It was a struggle – her eyes flicking to her mini screen or her hand flying to the device whenever something amazing/fun/pretty occurred.
A beautiful sunrise was viewed through a lens. A smiling friend was captured virtually instead of savoured immediately.
My favourite addictive behaviour with phones is the face plant.
Addicts place their phones screen-side down, as if they are attentive to the conversation, but have hair-trigger reflexes at the sound of a notification.
Rest assured, the world will turn without you recording its rotation.
Dr Jane Stephens is a UniSC journalism lecturer, media commentator and writer.